Life is impossible without difficulties. The moment we are born to this world, life gives us trials every day. Some of us overcome their ups and downs without sticking on them. Others tend to experience difficulties more often, in their lives run of bad luck lasts for a rather long time. It would be logical to ask why? Who divides people into successful and unsuccessful? Probably they do it themselves.
The people take negative life circumstances quite differently. “Losers “regard them as defeats, whereas “winners” perceive them as some valuable life lesson to enrich their life experience. The main rule of “winners “is the thesis: “there are no defeats, but there is a feedback”. Such life approach allows them to acquire severe life lessons more easily and advance to their aim. If a new dissatisfying situation arises, people act differently depending on their common behaviour strategy.
Let’s see how people of these two categories react to difficulties. The loser’s strategy. “Something is wrong again…” When he does not attain the desirable result the loser experiences strong emotional discomfort that prevents him to evaluate the situation objectively. He transforms this negative experience onto other situations in his life.
The winner’s strategy. What is the result? A person tries to separate this situation from the rest and give an objective analysis of facts. The loser’s strategy. Who is to blame? A person searches for the guilty. In most cases he blames the circumstances, more rarely people and almost never himself. The winner’s strategy. What have I learnt? A person is trying to find positive things in the situation. If you are given a lemon instead of apple – make lemonade. The loser’s strategy. Why did it happen? (Fixing on the past). All the thoughts are concentrated on the negative experience.
The winner’s strategy. How do I want to use it? (Fixing on the future). A winner has a dream. That is why he reflects how this experience can contribute in approaching his aim. The loser’s strategy. Limiting his future. “I will never swallow the same bate“. The winner’s strategy. New opportunities. How can I act more effectively in the future? As you see from the above examples the winner has a positive outlook and he is learning every day he lives. A winner is not a person who never loses. More likely a winner is someone who takes lessons from his mistakes and every day does something to approach his dream.
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Reynold Modeste
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